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DocuSign Envelope ID:076BOC8E-DE31-4F65-8936-FC9B33A56289 <br /> Lots of room to make changes <br /> A red pen (every time you see red it means the draft is getting better) <br /> The human voice (when you read aloud, mistakes are revealed) <br /> Because we wrote a collaborative review, it belonged to no one and everyone. A group- <br /> composed manuscript helps the whole class dig into to improve our collective work. See how <br /> many marks there are; <br /> A Collaborative Review <br /> by Mrs McKinney's 4th Graders <br /> fr Draft 1 <br /> 11: <br /> itva-nt-to-m-eet--a dog ho vill r inspire <br /> _ <br /> you n 'the true meaning of hopeAlove Read-- <br /> ,5 Meg Kearney`s picture book Trooper.-{wh t h l arki� <br /> u��- -rift-treo�-�tc�oretey7) �. <br /> j�Yl`UY r 04 c! J10 <br /> TrW rouper tells-the--tale--cif-howIaklog/startednlife as a Ef <br /> , j <br /> hI.Ple stray , scavengir for food a I <br /> 0�611 mistreated by humans. He adjusts t%PlV i&, but then he-- <br /> and ► c og,-bi�;li rim afe lured to a pound where <br /> he=fCI--Wfear-s.#e has no s <br /> k <br /> will tie v� ?) of <br /> i <br /> You can see at a glance we improved it markedly—and surprising to all of us, the next draft was <br /> almost as messy. I left both grades with Draft 3s that they're hoping to take at least to Draft 4 <br /> before they submit them to Storyworks,bringing us full circle. <br />